I could not access my “play mode” last weekend (so here's what I did)


I was EXTREMELY grumpy last Friday night…

The kids wanted to paint and there’s just something about paint with little kiddos that gets to me if I'm not in the right headspace to manage it.

On top of that, 1.5yo little gal kept getting hurt… first her finger got smashed in the door while I was going in and out getting supplies…

THEN she somehow busted open the little ice pack for her finger while I was trying to get her dinner and I freaked out that she was going to eat the gel inside and be harmed.

I was pretty much a tornado of anxiety mixed with a bit of rage just sweeping through the house, definitely in fight or flight (and I was fighting everyone).

I don’t even know exactly what was going on for me underneath it all (other than hormones and HANGER) but I was able to catch myself at one point after I’d snapped and hurt my 10yo stepdaughter’s feelings.


First I announced, “I’m REALLY grumpy. It’s nobody’s fault. I just cannot snap out of it right now and I’m sorry.”

I was still kind of tornado-ing at this point, btw — I wasn’t like down on my knees doing the whole deep breath “gentle parenting” thing.

Then I told 10yo, "I have a really important job for you. I cannot access my play mode right now. I need you to think of some kind of little fun game we can all play together once we sit down to eat. Can you be in charge of that?"

She lit up and assured me she was up for the task.


Once we all sat down, she settled on simple, silly counting game that kind of morphed into more chaos, but it was at least GOOD, laughing chaos. The energy was back on track. PHEW.

Part of this “win” was that by giving my stepdaughter the agency to be in charge of the game lifted her spirits — she was then able to lead us all into a more cheerful, connected, and centered state.

(KIDS ARE AMAZING)

She even did a hilarious interpretive dance that genuinely cracked me up and snapped me out of my funk.

I say all this to say that we don’t always have to be in “play mode” ourselves to lean into playfulness as a core family value.

Just being open to its importance and recognizing how powerful it is… that counts!!


My invitation for you this week:

If you’re feeling grumpy…

(first of all, grab a snack because you might be hangry like I was)

Then, see if you can put your kiddo in charge of “something silly.”

Maybe you can say, “I think I need to laugh but I can’t access my silly mode right now. Do you think you could find something silly or funny to help me feel a little bit less grumpy? Kids are the best at that!”

They might surprise you.

Cheering you on always,
Mia


P.S. Speaking of stepdaughters... if any stepmoms out there are reading this, I'm excited to announce that I've been invited to speak at StepmomCon 2026 -- a FREE virtual conference that supports stepmoms. I'm obviously speaking on the importance of playfulness, but there are LOTS of other experts that I'm looking forward to learning from, too. If you are a stepmom and want to tune in, or if you know a stepmom and want to share with them, TAP HERE to be reminded and tune in when the conference goes live April 22nd! MORE FROM PLAYFUL HEART PARENTING:

FAMPROV:

Family improv games for connection! A digital library with demonstration videos plus printable guide of fun improv games to bring you closer together through laughter and creativity.

PHP APPS BUNDLE

Simple, creative apps + printable card decks with 1400+ prompts that take the brainwork out and put connection and laughter in!

ACTIVATE PLAY MODE:

Audio course + community: Playful strategies for navigating everyday parenting challenges and reducing power struggles.

Playful Heart Parenting

I’m a mom, stepmom, and theatre educator helping exhausted parents access their inner creative playfulness for more connection and joy. No messy crafts, complicated setups, or sensory bins here! Just simple, silly moments that bring your family back together through laughter. My short weekly emails share reflections from real life and a simple invitation you can try for yourself or with your kids.

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